My attention has awakened to learning to see performance ever more specifically. Whether it's the demands of being on set as a director or the demands of running the business of an acting studio, it's very easy to get caught up in logistics and egotistical concern with competence.
But competence isn't the goal. Excellence is.
Competence is achieved via showing up and paying attention to getting things done. Important to be sure, but not an end in itself. I'm trying to think of an analogy. I want to say something related to painting. Like stretching and priming canvases. It's important, but just about anybody can be taught how to do it well. Painting is another story. The field gets narrower, but there are still a large number of people that can be taught to paint competently. But learning to see, that's another thing entirely.
Music provides an even more apt metaphor. If you can talk, you can sing. If you can count, you can play an instrument. With training and practice, competence is easily attainable. Advancing technology makes the means of production ever more democratic. But just because you can produce a slick CD in your bedroom it doesn't make you Mozart. Mozart reputedly composed his first symphony at the age of eight without instruction. That's genius, a much more rare combination of ability and perception.
I have some natural talents. Nothing on the level of genius and nothing that can be left without nurture and development. There's something in me that wants to hold onto technical competence. Doing so is an obstacle to developing whatever talent I possess. Perhaps I need more practical experience to feel more comfort with the logistics and technical necessities of filmmaking. I accept that. And I'm doing my best to work with actors and camera more regularly. As I do so, I want to remind myself that I'm not trying to get better at lighting or producing or providing snacks. I'm working in fast little three and four hour bursts so as to eliminate the need for breaks or meals and using as little equipment as possible. Once the performances and storytelling are at a consistent level of excellence I can explore making things look prettier in terms of lighting. Right now I just want enough light to learn to see performance better. It may be in the long run that the immediacy of working faster runs counter to the time it takes to light things competently. When I get to that point I'll have a better idea how much I'm able and willing to compromise. I think one of hte biggest accomplishments in my development is to know that I'm not yet there. I can posture all I want about being a complete filmmaker, but it ain't gonna make it so.
I've been thinking a lot about mask work. How it frees actors from their faces and the stories they hold in their bodies. The thing about film work is people assume it's a matter of naturalism and realism. Which are really just mannerisms most of the time. Mannerisms are generalities, even the personal ones. Because they come out of neuroses and second-guessing. They lack a connection to the universal. When actors use a mask, they tap into those things in themselves that are universal. Their work becomes more essential and that's where the connection happens. I want to see freedom of expression from head to toe in actors whether it's in the theater or in film. Perhaps it's naive of me, but when actors are able to work at a certain level, I don't see a lot of difference between the two. Unless we put a hidden camera in your bedroom, it's all artificial if your concern is realism.
In my class descriptions I wrote some years ago that one of the the goals is "to get beyond realism" in the On-Camera class. I was looking at that the other day, reflecting on its meaning. I guess what I mean is this, what we do as storytellers is real. If, and it's a huge gigantic IF, we're connected to what we're doing in the moment. Whether I'm on stage or in a real location. If in front of a green screen wearing a winter coat in the middle of summer I don't need to act cold. I don't need to trick myself into feeling cold. I don't need a lot of technique. I just need to listen and act according to what's going on. I'm wearing a big coat. Presumably they're going to put a picture of winter behind me. Even if I start to sweat, it's truthful. For one, because it's happening. And I've gotten sweaty in the winter plenty of times. If the production doesn't want me to sweat, it's on them to cool me down or accept it. But I digress.
So let's say I'm "walking in the snow" toward a cabin in the woods where my lover has been waiting for me all day. I'm going to be thinking about what's next while doing what I'm doing to get to what's next. That's the key difference between film and theater, in my opinion, theater most often is about presenting ideas in the moment and film is about what's going to happen next. Thinking about what's next is what we do in life. Whether your Zen monk, purist self likes it or not, it is being in the moment. Especially when we're in transit. And let's not forget film is a moving picture.
What I'm thinking depends on a lot of things. Am I still in love with my lover? Are my feet wet? Am I hungry? Do I need a drink? What happened before I left? Where did I go? Was my objective for leaving fulfilled? Did I have an idea or see something while I was out that I can't wait to share? Or keep to myself? If I know what I've been doing, what I am doing, and what I would like to do -- being aware of the given circumstances -- and I'm experiencing that freely, I don't have to do a lot connecting the dots of how cold I am or how I'm feeling emotionally. To say I'm thinking about all these things is misleading. I'm doing all the while - walking in the snow and experiencing my inner life in relation to my outer world. I don't have to create that external world for the audience, I just have to experience some outer world truthfully. The audience will respond to my truth and accept the scenic designer's or the CGI artist's work as if it's reality based on the deeper reality of my truth.
As much as I might like to experiment with quality neutral masks in my upcoming on-camera classes and my weekly filming, there's some factors that make that unlikely. One is they're expensive and my experience is that most actor-students don't like to spend money on tools for their acting. My not wanting to get into that is important to maintaining the necessary boundaries in order to keep my focus on directing rather than mentoring. I don't want to be a mentor to actor-students anymore. I get caught up in it in unhealthy ways. A related factor of neutral mask work is that the mask can be seen as goofy, I don't want to put myself in the position of instructing people that the mask demands respect to be effective. I'm not very good at being authoritative without relying on force. It's something I'm working on and I'm choosing my battles. A way that I can be more of a communicating guide is to be more playful, so I'm planning on experimenting with hooded sweatshirts and eventually wigs and wild makeup as a quasi-substitute for neutral masks. I know they're different, but I want to break away from realism and I want to do it in a playful manner.
Just giving Tara and October hats and guns took things to another level the other night. Thy were still themselves, but they were able to get out of their more finite selves and play. Play always happens on a more universal level - like laughter. When we did a more realistic scene this week, there was a sinking feeling in my stomach when I didn't feel like the realism was truthful. It made it more like work than play. I did the work to get it moving towards truth, but really now that I've gotten a taste of taking ourselves a little less seriously, I want to play. Who doesn't?
I didn't plan on this needing to be so long of a post. Anyway, what I'm getting at is I want and need to let go of technique, both acting and filmmaking, in order to tune into the actors' bodies to make sure they're experiencing the given circumstances fully. Letting go of technique is also known as trusting what you know. Trust what I know and trust what the crew knows and trust what the actors know. And start from there.
Camminare la strada,
Signore Direttore
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